Many people say, “Let me know when you go somewhere, I’ll join you”. So I call up or message people.

Here are some of responses I get to “Hi, I’m thinking of going to ABC, would you like to join in?”

1. “Yes, I’m in!” and they come along, and we have a great time. Good.

2. “Oh…not sure…let me check and tell you…” which means I have to keep calling back to check. Not good.

3. No response. I don’t know if their phone is busy, if they’ve not checked their mail. Not good.

4. No response, and a message after the outing saying, “I saw it late.” Not good.

5. “Who else is coming?” Decision to be made based on this. Not good.

6. “Yes, I’m in!” and then a last-minute cancellation, some with valid reasons, some..not. Not good.

7. “Yes, I’m in!” “No, I’m out!” “I changed my mind, I’m in!” “Sorry, I’m out” (and so it goes…)…Not good.

8. Several conditions are stated. (Eg “I will come if my maid comes to work the previous day” or “If I can finish my work assignments”) This is good or not good depending on the conditions! (“I’ll join in if I feel like it” is the one I like the least.)

9. “Sorry, I won’t be able to make it.” Clear reasons given. Not good, but I know where I stand.

I agree that this variety will always be there…but it’s tough to organize outings, especially when transportation has to be arranged, too. I hate leaving people out, so yes, I often take extra effort for it.

My thanks to the dear friends who agree, join in, and ensure that the trip is productive and fun.

My thanks, also to the friends who clearly state why they can’t come, and do join in when they can.