The Deepest Sorrows

September 12, 2011

The deepest sorrows are those that one cannot share with any other person….they are the private wounds, that bleed into one’s heart and soul, opening up now and then, in spite of our best care….. for glimpses into one’s own personal hell.

A woman loses her husband. Six months, or two years later, the world …even her own children, perhaps…have moved on. But she is pierced by the intensity of the grief, still. She cannot tell everyone, “I feel this sorrow as intensely as the day it happened, my wounds have not healed.” So…she suffers in the silence of loneliness and alienation.

A friend of mine once lost a boyfriend…before their relationship was “official”. She suffered all the grief and agony of a wife…without ever being able to express it openly.

Then there are the wounds that our own family may inflict on us. When someone is close to your heart, you are very vulnerable to the shaft that drives straight home, and cannot get dislodged easily. You have no armour against the people who are dearest to you. Sometimes, I see children who do not want their parents too near them; I see parents who have “disowned” their children for choosing life partners on their own… a chasm that cannot be bridged, appears, and sears the heart. One cannot complain about one’s own family, so the tears flow into one’s heart instead of on to one’s cheeks.

A child is abused by its parents, or relatives…and often cannot express what s/he has undergone. The scars never really heal…not for a lifetime.

Why such a morbid post? I don’t know…this thought just occurred to me..at least I can share the thought.

Grief that cannot be expressed is the deepest grief of all. and often does not heal through one’s lifetime.