..... made an interesting point; he says that often, women, to validate their own choices and lifestyle, have to compare others' choices and lifestyles unfavourably with their own.  "Whatever I did is the right thing, so if she has done something different, she must be wrong."  Perhaps, some people really need to do this...but how exhausting it must be, to be constantly comparing and validating and convincing oneself that one is right, and happy! When one is really happy, one really doesn't feel the need to compare oneself with others at all....except to feel how lucky one is. Well...to balance out my negative post...I do know several women who have definitely NOT made the right choices (or had it made for them)...and yet seem to accept their lot with grace and seem pretty happy within the parameters they have. A woman with a schizophrenic husband, and one with a spastic child (they never had any choices at all) ...they are such basically happy people that I feel they are living lessons to me. So...there are all sorts of people that make up the world, and I can lift up my eyes in respect to those who are obviously dealing well with whatever life hands them, and don't see moaning as an option.</P>